Summer of Reminiscence: Helping Aged Loved Ones Relive Their Best Summer Memories

“God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December” (James M. Barrie).

Summertime in the Lehigh Valley is a time for get-togethers: graduations, picnics, trips far and near, holidays, spontaneous gatherings—any excuse will do! We find that, as people age, the conversational spectrum changes according to one’s stage of life: from hopes and dreams to family matters, then gradually to health issues and fond memories. Residents of Heather Glen Senior Living often find fellowship in sharing and comparing memories, a satisfying and even therapeutic activity.

Of course, we encourage our residents to welcome friends, family, and other visitors who care about them and wish to brighten their day.

How can I share memories with my loved ones?

One of the key aspects of a pleasant visit is to share memories with each other. Fond memories form an invisible foundation that can uphold one with hope, a sense of accomplishment and worth, and an emotional boost.

Perhaps the most important requirement for a pleasant visit is a listening ear; that shows you really care and can get the memories flowing!

Sharing memories with a dementia resident can require a little extra patience and planning, but can be a rewarding experience for everyone.

Because it is summertime, your loved one’s senses are attuned to summer thoughts and feelings. So, think of summery times you’ve shared at any age, especially activities, such as roller skating, biking, fishing, hiking, riverside picnics, rides in the country, and walks in the city.

Does the Lehigh Valley offer any traditional summer activities?

Does it! If your loved one has ties to the Valley, he or she may have attended these events and would be delighted to visit them again. Keep in mind that there may be crowds, noise, and distractions that could agitate or confuse your loved one.

• Musikfest is the granddaddy of local music festivals, featuring artists your loved one might remember. July 31–August 10
• There are local concerts galore (mostly free!). All summer, many locations.
• If your loved one was a grease monkey, cruiser, or just likes cars, Das Awkscht Fescht is one of the largest outdoor antique and classic car shows. August 1–3
• If a quiet picnic or walk is on the menu, here is a list of popular Valley parks and cozy spots: Discover Lehigh Valley.

Here are some ways to help your senior loved one reminisce

Go through photo albums Looking at and handling photos is more fun and effective than scrolling on smartphones. Make sure photos are in chronological order and portray key life moments. Don’t overwhelm them with more than a couple of photos per page. Photos can picture people, places, sunrises, sunsets, feats and falls—anything that conveys emotion and involvement.

Collect their mementos If available, souvenirs, knick-knacks, treasures, etc., can be brought along for your loved one to touch and handle when appropriate. This may be difficult for residents because they may no longer have a house. If you have some items to show them, ask what they mean to them. Bring some of yours along and talk about them.

Connect, don’t correct The purpose of this activity is to make or renew connections and share memories. So what if a dementia resident gets names, places, and dates wrong? It’s their world, and constant correction may only confuse and agitate them.

Engage all of their senses All of a person’s senses—sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste—often work together to form impressions in the brain. Any one of them can trigger memories. Familiar items such as blankets, toys, fragrances, animals (if allowed), plants, foods, clothing, books, music, videos, paintings, awards—pretty much anything you can think of that your loved one can relate to—can help inspire memories and conversation.

Think of their former environment and think outside the box. Think candles, pinecones, air freshener, barbecue sauce, towels, hairbrush, recorded voices, TV theme songs; you never know!

Ask questions Questions can stimulate conversation. Do not ask, “Do you remember … ?” The person can become sad or confused if they realize their memory is failing. Also, don’t “quiz” a memory-impaired person; let them initiate the memory and do not argue with, dismiss, or correct what they say.

Here are some sample questions. Again, gauge the mental state of your loved one when choosing questions.

• Do you have a favorite song, movie, color, or book (or whatever)?
• What is your favorite food?
• What is (or was) your favorite place to visit?
• What is your favorite holiday?
• Who are your friends?

Make it an activity or game Stay upbeat and make your time together fun. Be encouraging and act interested, no matter how the trip down memory lane pans out. It can be a welcome, refreshing distraction from what a person might see as an unpleasant life situation for whatever reason.

Remember, for most people, their #1 topic of conversation is themselves. And reviewing pleasant memories can be the pressure valve that releases stress in a senior’s life and makes them feel a little lighter!

If you’re interested in learning more about life at Heather Glen Senior Living or would like to see our community for yourself, give us a call at (610) 841-4478 or fill out our online form today.